Blessed.  Only word for how I feel about me, today. 

Am so happy to be so loved and celebrated, by friends, family, colleagues etc etc.

Week long marathon indeed!!  I haven't eaten so much at dinner for so long that it's on the borderline of being uncomfortable... 😆

But hey, even that's a blessing eh?  So many people in the world don't even have anyone to remember their birthdays or have the means to celebrate...

I am so thankful for Meixin, a big constant and support.  And Xinrong, even with her ambivalent hot and cold ways lols...  And Shimin, Catherine, Zhixian, Eunice, Adam, office makan gang, this gang that gang, my team, my buddy team, my team outside of my team, my bosses, my clients, my family...  The more I thank, the more I am reminded that there are so many people to be thankful for.  And that there is so much to thank about.

Thank You Universe for making me me, and for giving me this incomparable life and experience.

Through it all, if I sum up the good and bad, ups and downs, I've drawn a positive, fabulous, fantastic lot in life.

So 32, here I come!

Let's try to Rock the World!!! 😇😈

If it hurts you to see me happy (with or without you), then see me you shall not...

The last thing I want is to see you unhappy...

Yet happy I am bound to be, for aren't we all in search for our own happiness?

Strangely I am in a interestingly zen place, where I don't hurt as much by your rejection, yet I remain baffled and perturbed by your attitude towards me...

Have I truly done something wrong?

Yet the problem is likely not some faux pas I had committed; the crime had been committed in your mind and perpetuated by your imagination.

Or perhaps the reverse is true. 

By not being able to fully let go of that hurt, and letting go of that relationship, I had driven that stake deeper into my own heart.

Your indifference became a crime, your preferential treatment a torture, and your continual unhappiness in spite it all, a lingering smarting pain...

By my focusing on you, it gives those around me an unfair sense of neglect, and I am sensible enough to know it (and not without experiencing a tinge of guilt)

I don't prefer you, yet I'm still obsessed with you, perhaps cos I really don't wish to write you off as a lost cause in my life.

Is it not a sickness to cry for the moon?

I love you my friend, as much as a friend can love another friend. 

But perhaps it is time for me to store away those shared memories, and focus on the here and now, with the people who are willing and able to share their heart, life and soul with me, rather than looking up at the ice tower where the Princess is trapped by her own emotions about herself...

Time to Let It Go...

I was reading one or two of my last blogs, and wondering how people can change so much and be so much the same over the years.

Mingmei is still Mingmei, with the same challenges, the same hurts, the same pains, yet with a different mindset somehow?

Change creeps up on people, so slowly, so silently, that you wouldn't see the change until you look back on your past.

P/S Old draft of a post that was meant to be up Feb 2014. Finally posted now.

其实我们早就走在两条平行线上, 是我自己傻,以为我们还会有交集。

原来我们早已不算是朋友了...  

Goodbye my friend, it was nice knowing you...